


Take A Deep Breath (Exhale Your Worries)

by x_yehet_pcy



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: ChanSoo Week, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-07
Updated: 2017-06-07
Packaged: 2018-11-09 18:39:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11110527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/x_yehet_pcy/pseuds/x_yehet_pcy
Summary: Kyungsoo has lines he can't get out of his head and Chanyeol helps him turn them into his first song. Alternatively: Kyungsoo and Chanyeol spend a late night at his studio together.





	Take A Deep Breath (Exhale Your Worries)

**Author's Note:**

> this was written in oct 2016 in like 2.5 hours because of the legendary love yourself cover and that one vapp when yeol accidentally played a song with soo's voice in it sO

Chanyeol thinks he hears a faint knocking somewhere beyond his headphones, and for a second he's scared, because it's almost three in the morning and no one should still be up besides him and his music, but then he decides it must have been his imagination and disregards it entirely.

Right when he's about to raise the volume of his computer's system to see if the beat he's just added onto the song sounds okay, the knocks return and he is able to resist the urge to turn around only to see nothing there-- it has happened before, when Chanyeol was too tired that he was starting to imagine things, too tired that he thought the new layer of background beats in his composition were actually someone knocking on his door.

Making music alone can be lonely sometimes, he'll admit that much, but this is where he finds solace in and he's in love with the feeling. This isn't something he'll ever get tired of--

When his phone buzzes, vibrations in his hoodie's pocket insistent, Chanyeol startles so much that he almost tips his chair back and falls. Fortunately he is able to stop himself from falling and he calms himself down enough to tell himself he's ridiculous for being so easy to scare. He's in his safest place, after all.

He takes his phone out of his pocket still vibrating, and when the name on the caller id registers in his just-recovered mind, he immediately pauses the music he has playing through his headphones and answers the call.

"Kyungsoo-yah? Kyungsoo?"

"How about you open up already?"

Chanyeol is confused for barely a second before he whips his head around so fast he almost chokes himself with the wires of his headphones.

There, through the glass door, he sees Kyungsoo standing with his phone pressed against his ear in one hand, a plastic bag from the convenience store nearby in the other, the bill of his cap tapping against the glass, an almost shy smile on his lips.

To say Chanyeol is surprised wouldn't do the situation justice; his heart has just calmed down from imagining ghosts coming into his studio, but now his heart is beating too fast for a whole other reason.

"What.. What are you doing here?"

Kyungsoo raises an eyebrow at him through the door and hangs his phone up, the beep loud in Chanyeol's ear as he watches dazedly at Kyungsoo's figure stepping back from the door before turning around.

Chanyeol has never taken his headphones off and stood up from his chair that it toppled over so fast before in his life, and it's only to open the door for Kyungsoo.

He's breathing too hard for having run only such a small distance, but he supposes he can just say that Kyungsoo scared the shit out of him if he chooses to point it out.

"Kyungsoo-yah," he calls after Kyungsoo who's already almost opening another door to get out, and Chanyeol watches with satisfaction when Kyungsoo turns around in his spot to look at Chanyeol.

He looks a little put-off, but not actually angry, and Chanyeol thinks that if he has to call Kyungsoo's name over and over again to make him forgive him by annoyance, he'd do it.

"Come on," he says, stepping out of his studio and plodding over to Kyungsoo, dragging him by his hand back, and then closing the glass door behind them. "Ah, you're really here."

"Did you think I was some ghost or something," Kyungsoo mumbles, taking a seat on the soft couch. Chanyeol only steps back to give him some more space, and watches him as he crosses one leg over the other.

"Actually," Chanyeol laughs. "I thought I was hearing things when I heard knocking--"

"You heard me knocking and you still didn't open the door--"

"I didn't think there'd be an actual person there," Chanyeol defends, "MQ-hyung is out of town and he's practically the only one who visits me here anymore."

Kyungsoo uncrosses his legs and takes off his cap. Like this Chanyeol can see his face better, and as he rubs his hands against his knees with a sigh, Chanyeol is afraid he's upset him.

"I used to visit you a lot here, too," Kyungsoo defends back, a little too quietly. "Or have you forgotten I used to do that.."

 _No_ , Chanyeol wants to answer.  _I love it on my own, but I always miss you when I'm here._  "It was a couple of times, not a lot," he corrects, but only because it’s true. Maybe it is a lot compared to the other members-- none of them really disturb him when they know he's locked himself up in his studio again. But about three or four times, Kyungsoo had visited him there and told him to hurry up and sleep because they had a schedule the next day, had waited for him (once even falling asleep on the couch) and hadn't left until Chanyeol turned off all his equipment and locked up so they could leave together.

"Whatever," Kyungsoo says. His eyes are wide as he surveys the small room, taking in the little changes Chanyeol has done with it since the last time Kyungsoo was here, and his heart warms when Kyungsoo smiles when his gaze settles on a wallet-sized group photo of the nine of them, on a small stand beside one of his guitars.

Chanyeol clears his throat when he catches himself staring too long. "Anyway," he sits back on his chair and turns around on its wheels so that he's facing Kyungsoo seated on his couch. "So you're here."

"I am," Kyungsoo affirms, a different kind of smile on his face now. This one is shy, reassuring, warm and sweet, _like Kyungsoo is_. "See, there are these lines I can't get out of my head, I really couldn't sleep. I asked the other members where you were and they said you were here. So I thought I'd..." He trails off, eyes turning downcast as he fiddles with his fingers.

Chanyeol tries not to assume anything to save himself from any unnecessary pain, but thinking about  _one_ , how Kyungsoo went looking for him when he couldn't fall asleep,  _two_ , how Kyungsoo actually came over to his studio even though it's an ungodly hour at night (or morning) already,  _three_ , how Kyungsoo brought him his favorite snacks (he can see through the translucent plastic bad that Kyungsoo's put on the couch beside himself), and  _four_ , that there are lines stuck inside his head and he thinks Chanyeol might know what to do with them... Chanyeol can't help but assume he's a little special to Kyungsoo.  _Just a little_.

Chanyeol hasn't said anything in response yet, too busy telling himself not to make his giddiness too obvious. "So I was thinking you could help me..?" There's an almost inaudible lilt to Kyungsoo's sentence, but in the silence of the studio, Chanyeol can easily sense the nervousness in his voice, even if it is barely there.

How Kyungsoo could even think that Chanyeol would ever reject him is beyond Chanyeol. He tries to stifle his smile.

"You mean it?" Because Chanyeol's been wanting to do this kind of thing since forever, but they've only ever sticked to on-the-whim guitar covers that Chanyeol would have to record on his phone so he never forgets the sound of  _them_  together. He's never thought to bring it up, though, no matter how close they are, because he knows Kyungsoo is too busy for a full-blown production with Chanyeol-- everyone knows all his works take a lot of time.

He's also never thought to bring it up no matter how much he wants to because it wouldn't feel right to force Kyungsoo into writing a song with him. In the first place, he's never expressed any interest in writing his own music. When it comes to his interest in Chanyeol’s writing, though, well, that's a different story.

Kyungsoo is his number one supporter when it comes to his music, whether it be his covers or his own compositions. Even though it's never really seemed like it, Kyungsoo's always been there when Chanyeol couldn't get a certain meter right, or when he couldn't get his own second vocals right, or when he couldn't get the progression or something else of that sort right. Kyungsoo claims he knows next to nothing about music technicalities besides voices, and Chanyeol has never wanted to make him uncomfortable by enumerating his frustrations about this measure or that beat.

Kyungsoo may rarely be inside his studio, but he knows that if he ever calls him up, Kyungsoo would be there to answer. That's also why Chanyeol had corrected Kyungsoo when he said he used to visit a lot. Because it doesn't matter as much to Chanyeol, how many hours or even minutes Kyungsoo had spent right in the studio with him, because Kyungsoo would always answer his call on its first ring. And besides, with how much Chanyeol thinks about Kyungsoo, he might as well be living with him in his studio already.

Chanyeol laughs quietly at the thought.

"What are you laughing about," Kyungsoo complains lightly, almost whining if Chanyeol actually considers it. "I really want to write it with you--"

Kyungsoo's eyes immediately widen at his own words, as if he hadn't meant to say that out loud, and this time Chanyeol doesn't bother to hide his excitement as he grins widely, already standing up and grabbing the spare chair from the corner of the room.

"Listen to me--"

"Yeah, yeah," Chanyeol lets out, grabbing Kyungsoo's hand to stand him up and forcing him on his chair, seating himself on the spare. It only makes sense in his head that this humble place is undeserving of Kyungsoo’s presence, so he tries to make up for it by making him sit on the more comfortable chair that he never lets anyone else sit on, not even MQ.

Chanyeol is already opening up software on his computer, closing everything he was working on just a few minutes ago after saving all of his progress. He feels Kyungsoo's eyes on him but he doesn't let that distract him as he sets up the mic on the mini stand between them.

Chanyeol's fingers may or may not be trembling just a little with excitement, and his grin may or may not be splitting his face when he turns the mic on and tests it. So when there are suddenly hands on both of his around the mic, he only then realizes his nerves were getting to him.

"Hey," Kyungsoo says, the previous panic in his eyes dissolved into a certain fondness Chanyeol is desperately wishing isn't only his delusion. "Why are you making this such a big deal?" He sounds embarrassed. "I don't know anything about this." He takes one hand away and waves around himself, gesturing shyly to all of Chanyeol's equipment and software. "Plus, the lines aren't even that good and you'll be let down if I can't give you anything that'll be satisfying for you--"

Chanyeol takes back Kyungsoo's hand in his, and Kyungsoo's eyes are locked on where their skins touch, and he's still talking about how stupid he is because the lines have been stuck on his mind for days now and when he wrote them down it didn't make much sense and all that, and while Chanyeol really is paying attention because this  _is_  a big deal to him, this  _is_  a huge thing that Kyungsoo is trying something he never has before out, Chanyeol can't help but drag Kyungsoo closer using the grip he has on the other's hand and placing a small kiss on the corner of Kyungsoo's mouth.

Kyungsoo's words halt instantly, mouth staying open in a small o, and when Chanyeol pulls back, smiling despite himself, Kyungsoo's eyes are fixed on him and he's so, so beautiful.

Kyungsoo shakes his head, as if to clear his thoughts (as if Chanyeol isn't the one who's so overjoyed that Kyungsoo is right there with him, in his studio, of his own accord and not because the managers sent him to tell him he needs to sleep, of his own accord because he wants to make music with Chanyeol, of his own accord because he believes in Chanyeol), the smallest of smiles tugging at his lips as he takes the mic from its stand and away from Chanyeol's hands.

Chanyeol can only watch as Kyungsoo unnecessarily examines the mic, the small distraction appreciated so he can gather his bearings once more, and when Kyungsoo starts talking again, about what the song could be about and how it came to his mind and what kind of genre they could make it to be, Chanyeol listens attentively.

"Can I.. Can I hear it, then?" Chanyeol asks carefully, when Kyungsoo has finished his piece. Kyungsoo's eyes widen again, as if they weren't wide enough and Kyungsoo hasn't been doing it excessively just this one night, and Chanyeol scrambles to explain. "I mean I'll hear it eventually anyway, right, because we'll have to record it so I can add--"

"Chanyeol-ah," Kyungsoo calls seriously, "You aren't going to judge me right?"

Chanyeol is almost offended Kyungsoo could even think that. "Of course not. Never."  _You're my music soulmate, after all._

Kyungsoo turns around, facing forward and putting the mic down, its head facing away from him. He starts singing, voice shaky at first, but then building and getting steady, and Chanyeol has a hard time distinguishing the English words. But Kyungsoo's voice sounds so good bouncing around in the confines of the four walls of his studio, carrying heavy emotion like Kyungsoo's lyrics mean more than just words to him, and Chanyeol sits there awestruck. His mind should be focused on trying to make sense of the English words he isn't much too familiar with, should be trying to pick up on Kyungsoo's song and start thinking up what instruments and effects would go well with it-- but his mind focuses instead on Kyungsoo singing in front of him, singing  _for_ him.

Kyungsoo's always been the best singer for him; no matter what song he sings, there is no doubt about it in Chanyeol's mind. Kyungsoo is his best. But somehow, at this moment, as Kyungsoo glances to his side at Chanyeol, knowing that he wrote these lines and that Chanyeol is the only one to be hearing them.. It all takes his breath away.

Right in the middle it's as if Kyungsoo's stopped there, and he starts improvising, adding lyrics as he goes along, a mix of Korean and English words towards the end. Chanyeol wonders if he's really had anything written down already. This sounds too..  _In-the-moment_. That isn't a bad thing. Chanyeol is good at remembering, so if Kyungsoo changes something later on, he'll know for sure, even if he doesn't understand English so well.

Kyungsoo finishes and Chanyeol is silent, waiting for Kyungsoo to turn to him, to ask for a reaction, to see if he actually cares what Chanyeol thinks. When he does, with a tilt to his head and lips pressed tight together, Chanyeol lets out a sigh of satisfaction at how good Kyungsoo's voice was, and now added with the fact that the lyrics came from himself, Chanyeol thinks he falls even deeper.

"That's all I'm giving you," Kyungsoo declares, voice attempting to be clinical, like Chanyeol is a professional composer who asked to be given good material, like he wasn't nervous at all. But in a moment, his shoulders fall, back slouching as he groans. "I know, it sounds weird."

Chanyeol isn't going to deny that. It sounds incomplete. His heart swells at the thought that he's going to be the one to complete Kyungsoo's song. He's going to be the one to complete Kyungsoo.

"I have a favor," Kyungsoo says now, picking the mic up and putting it back onto its stand. "You have to be honest with me. About everything. I don't know how to write good lyrics like you do, and I can't play a million instruments like you can--"

"I don't play a million instruments," Chanyeol splutters, realizing too late that this is the first he talks since Kyungsoo's let him listen to him sing, and even though Kyungsoo laughs a little at that, the slight disappointment is evident anyway.

"Was it that bad?"

 _Not at all,_  Chanyeol wants to say. It really wasn't. He's sure that if he says that though, Kyungsoo wouldn't believe him, not after staying quiet for so long after he's finished singing.  _It's beautiful and I'm proud of you._

"Next time, I'll be better for you," Kyungsoo states, voice determined. His eyes go soft as he follows, "Let's not do it tonight, after all."

Chanyeol knows he doesn't mean it, but for show of obedience and agreement, he gives a small nod and turns back to his computer, reopening the files he was working on and trying to pick up where he left off.

To his side, Kyungsoo watches with rapt attention at what Chanyeol is doing, and Chanyeol is pretty sure he doesn't really getting anything besides him dragging clips and layering them over each other on a line. He stays there though, by Chanyeol's side, and there isn't much Chanyeol could want more.

After a few minutes he can feel Kyungsoo's gaze shifting away from his screen and from him, and he doesn't blame him, really. Nothing is really exciting about what he's doing, right now, because some bits and pieces of Kyungsoo's song is all he could think about; all he's doing now is testing out different beat samples with his song distractedly. He keeps his eyes on what he's doing, of course, determined to make his acting convincing, but he notices in his peripheral that Kyungsoo's fingers are skimming over his keyboard. One finger hits one white bar, and then a black one, and then a white one again. The keyboard isn't turned on so it doesn't make a sound, and Chanyeol thinks it's adorable how confused Kyungsoo is that it's quiet even as he continues pressing on some of the keys. He bites his lip and slows his fingers down now, as if having caught himself misbehaving beside Chanyeol, and he goes back to pressing on the keys one by one.

Chanyeol loves how bored Kyungsoo looks now, that he's playing a soundless instrument he doesn't really know how to play and his own lyrics are sung from his lips unconsciously. If the keyboard was actually on, it would sound so dissonant with Kyungsoo's quiet, pretty voice, but it's like Kyungsoo doesn't realize he's doing it in the first place.

So Chanyeol secretly reaches for the wires beside him and plugs in the keyboard, turning it on by pressing a button at the corner-- he disguises this action as reaching over to something on Kyungsoo's side of the table, smiling to himself when Kyungsoo immediately drew back to make space for him and then resuming his position when Chanyeol is back in his own seat.

He knows Kyungsoo makes sure he is immersed right back in what he's doing before he reaches for the keys again, and the startled gasp he lets out when the key he presses makes a sound has Chanyeol fighting back a smirk.

Chanyeol acts like he was surprised, as if he's just now realizing Kyungsoo was playing around, and when he turns to him Kyungsoo is immediately apologizing.

Whether it's for touching an instrument without permission, or for making a sound when he should be quiet thinking Chanyeol is working, or for the entire thing about coming here saying he has a song and then saying they shouldn't do it tonight after all, Chanyeol can't decide what it really is that Kyungsoo is apologizing for.

"Why are you saying sorry," Chanyeol laughs lightly, facing his computer again. "You can do anything you want in here." He says this because it's true; he  _can_  do anything he wants in here. This is Chanyeol's special place, and he's always done whatever he wants in here, no limits, because this is his alone. But with Kyungsoo here, beside him, this time, this place is Kyungsoo's, too. "Touch anything you want. You can even touch me too," Chanyeol says teasingly, sparing a glance at Kyungsoo who looks like he's holding back a smile of his own, too. Then he finally laughs out loud when Kyungsoo smacks him upside the head. He doesn't feel pain, though, not when Kyungsoo slides his chair to press against Chanyeol's and their shoulders are touching. Kyungsoo is so much smaller than him, but he appreciates the shared heat nonetheless.

From that point on the silence only gets more comfortable, sometimes accompanied by their shared breathing in the small space, the beats that Chanyeol is playing with on his computer now that he's pulled the headphones out, and the occasional press of keys that Kyungsoo tries out.

Too much, the temptation is, to start working on the song Kyungsoo has brought for him. His fingers are itching to turn the mic on because Kyungsoo has started singing unconsciously again, grimacing at his own inability to do what he knows Chanyeol usually does so easily. Besides that, though, the way he lights up when he plays a note that fits well with the certain line he's sang is unmistakable.

Chanyeol still isn't watching him openly, still facing his computer, and at the moments that Kyungsoo makes a good sound combination of the piano and his voice, he sees that Kyungsoo turns to him excitedly, as if wanting to ask if Chanyeol heard it, wanting to ask Chanyeol for some kind of affirmation. Chanyeol wants to say  _yes, I heard it, that one was good,_  and Chanyeol wants to affirm Kyungsoo, too. But he seems satisfied enough that even though Chanyeol acts like he's paying him no mind, he turns back to the keys anyway and continues pressing random keys.

A few minutes of this pass, and Chanyeol doesn't realize he's already opening a new file for their future song (yes, Chanyeol is sure they'll get there). Kyungsoo is still doing his thing, immersed in his own world, and Chanyeol decides he can play along, now.

At a certain line when Kyungsoo presses a key and it matches perfectly with the word he sings, he isn't able to stop himself from turning to Chanyeol-- and when he catches Chanyeol watching, his shyness comes back, so quickly and so easily that Chanyeol almost tells Kyungsoo immediately that he liked the way it sounded, too.

Kyungsoo coughs into his hands and puts them onto his lap, straightening his back as he tries to find words to say.

Finally, Chanyeol decides that this is such a good time-- both of them are inspired; Kyungsoo is experimenting and Chanyeol can practically hear his own music blending well with Kyungsoo's voice right in his head, so he tells Kyungsoo to continue.

"What-- that was nothing," Kyungsoo rushes to say, though he looks like he honestly wants to touch the keys again, wants to sing again-- Chanyeol knows the feeling all too well, when he gets the inspiration for a song and he's finding a groove where nothing yet everything is falling into place.

"No, seriously," Chanyeol insists, careful not to make it feel like he's forcing Kyungsoo, but rather like he's just giving him the push he needs, that little motivation that he can do as much as he wants to because it's his song.

"But--" Kyungsoo presses a single key, withdrawn. "It doesn't sound right, it won't.."

Chanyeol scoots over and presses their sides together again, the warmth as well-received as before. He places a hand over the one Kyungsoo let linger on the keys after he hit a note, and he feels Kyungsoo sigh.

"I'm here, though, Kyungsoo," he whispers, looking down at him. Their faces are close and he feels Kyungsoo's breath against his skin when he looks up, following Chanyeol’s silent request when he'd placed the forefinger and thumb of his free hand on Kyungsoo's chin. "I'm right here."

Maybe he says this meaning  _I'm right here because this is my studio_ , or meaning  _I'm right here so you can do what you want in my studio_ , or meaning  _I'm right here so keep playing with your song because I'll listen_ , or meaning  _I'm right here so if you get stuck on a part I can tell you what to do next_ , or meaning  _I'm right here so let's work on your song because I know how to complete it_ , or meaning  _I'm right here and I love you_. And maybe Kyungsoo's nod means he understands everything Chanyeol doesn't know how to say. It probably does.

Chanyeol takes his own cap off, ruffling his hair before he bends forward to place it at the corner of his desk, and then bends a little lower, his ear to Kyungsoo’s mouth. “Hm?” He’s asking for an answer to an unworded question. If he wants to continue, if he has enough faith that whatever Kyungsoo can give him, he’ll turn it into a good song-- if.. If he  _accepts_  Chanyeol.

Kyungsoo presses his forehead to the side of Chanyeol’s head and nudges gently.

The affection there, and his answer-- Chanyeol's heart swells and he can't help but steal a kiss, just a quick peck to Kyungsoo's temple as he pulls back and start really setting up the mic and pulling up the software for recording.

Kyungsoo doesn't seem as nervous now, but he makes sure to press himself against Chanyeol before he starts playing random notes and singing again.

When Chanyeol suggests he start from the beginning, Kyungsoo complains that he doesn't remember which key he pressed but that it sounded okay, so Chanyeol reassures him with an,  _It's okay because I remember._

He does; whether it was a C or a D or an E minor that Kyungsoo pressed, he remembers, and he's never been more thankful that he's musically inclined because now he can help ease Kyungsoo's worries about something he's trying for the first time.

Chanyeol writes music for himself. His music is his own. It's never been for Kyungsoo. But now.. Maybe.. It's music _with_ Kyungsoo.

At one point Kyungsoo's brought a hand to Chanyeol's thigh and let it stay there, his other hand still busy playing out random notes. Chanyeol works on his own side, chooses the right notes in a chord that would sound better for a line and asking Kyungsoo to sing it again to check, and if Kyungsoo is impressed at how quickly Chanyeol is able to work with him, he tries his best not to show it. Though it's obvious with the way he squeezes Chanyeol's thigh under his hand in silent praise.

Sometimes Kyungsoo would try it, too, singing a line over and over again while pressing a different key each time to try it out the way Chanyeol does it, and he's a little impatient, if Chanyeol really thinks about it. Chanyeol giggles at one point and Kyungsoo flushes, but he disguises his embarrassment by calling him out on laughing at someone who is obviously not as experienced as himself and telling him, with a pout that looks both natural and uncharacteristic on Kyungsoo's face at the same time, that he should help him instead of laughing.

Chanyeol knows he hasn't offended Kyungsoo, not really, but he apologizes anyway.

Kyungsoo’s frustration is easy to come, but when Chanyeol leans the side of his head to rest against the top of Kyungsoo's, it's easy to go, too.

He doesn't know how much time has passed, but at one full verse and three-fourths of the chorus, the right notes in place taken note of in a notepad at the corner of Chanyeol's computer screen, he decides he wants to enhance more of the sounds he already has and starts rolling his seat to move over to the other set of keyboards at the side. This one has more effects and he'll be able to add some more of his specialty with this one, if only to impress Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo startles, almost falling off of his chair because Chanyeol had gotten so comfortable having Kyungsoo leaning against him that he thought physics wouldn't affect them and Kyungsoo would automatically follow, and he curses when he's steadied himself back up on his seat.

Kyungsoo looks at him in mock anger and huffs out a  _Warn a guy next time, would you,_  kicking Chanyeol's chair so it rolls farther away and hit against the keyboard.

"What are you doing there anyway," Kyungsoo mutters.  _Why are you suddenly so far_ , is what Chanyeol thinks he hears.

"This one," Chanyeol waves his hands towards his keyboard, proud because this is one of his top favorite instruments, "Can make our song better."

Chanyeol doesn't realize he's called it ' _our song_ ' until Kyungsoo's face blanks and he whispers it to himself.  _Our song_.

"I mean--" he doesn't understand his sudden need to explain himself; maybe it's because it is Kyungsoo's song more than it is his even though he's the one adding basically everything of the accompaniment, but he stumbles over his words anyway. "I mean-- well,  _your_  song-- since the lyrics are from you and you're the one singing--"

"Hey, Chanyeol," Kyungsoo cuts off suddenly, a twinkle in his eyes as he brings his foot back and crosses his legs over each other. He looks so small like this, sitting like a child, Chanyeol thinks to himself,  _so cute_. He looks at Chanyeol intently, eyes searching for something Chanyeol doesn't know what on his face would show. "We've done covers before."

How could Chanyeol ever forget? Playing the guitar for him is all Chanyeol's ever wanted with Kyungsoo.

Chanyeol shrugs, tries to make it seem like he doesn't know what Kyungsoo could probably be implying, what invitation Kyungsoo is indirectly trying to give him-- tries to make it seem like he hasn't studied the lyrics and learned the guitar for Love Yourself the moment Kyungsoo had mentioned it on a radio show. That would make him seem too eager, especially if he suggests the title as if he knows Kyungsoo did mention having him play guitar for him.

"Let's do one," Kyungsoo suggests, voice that tiny bit hopeful that makes Chanyeol bite on the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling too much. "We haven't done one in a while. I'll even let you record it and everything. Like we did for Boyfriend."

Chanyeol feigns considering it, though he's a hundred percent sure he's going to be saying yes no matter what Kyungsoo asks of him.

"What song? So I can practice," Chanyeol excuses, but right now he just wants confirmation that Kyungsoo still remembers he thought about Chanyeol that one time he was away on solo activities.

"You know Love Yourself, right?"

 _Of course_ , Chanyeol knows. When Kyungsoo had mentioned it, that night when he came home and the following nights for an entire week, Kyungsoo had been singing it, both to himself quietly or out loud when there weren't many of the members around to tease him about liking Beiber; and call Chanyeol delusional but now he feels like maybe he'd been hinting it all along.

But above both their solo activities and actual group activities, there is little to no time for things like this. At this moment, too, Chanyeol wonders why they're both here instead of resting because it isn't like EXO aren't busy. And now here they are working on a song their agency won't ever recognize and even considering a cover that Chanyeol isn't sure Kyungsoo would let him post if they actually get to doing it.

"Love Yourself," Chanyeol repeats. "You know the lyrics to it?"

"Hm?" Kyungsoo's gone back to the keyboard when Chanyeol's zoned out a little.

"The lyrics aren't actually about loving yourself as in you should love yourself because you're the first person who should love you. It's about someone telling someone else to love yourself if you--"

"I know that." Kyungsoo turns to him again. "I wasn't expecting you to know it, though. You've looked for a translation before?"

Well, there goes Chanyeol's act of only hearing about Love Yourself of his own volition and not because it's a song he wanted to play for Kyungsoo.

"I read one before, yeah," Chanyeol says in defeat.

Kyungsoo only eyes him questioningly before nodding and playing again. "If you wanna study it, maybe we could cover that. I really like the song, and I think your guitar would go great with it."

 _A compliment_. "You're just saying that so I'd play guitar for you," Chanyeol grumbles, though he does try to hide the flush he feels at the compliment.

"You really think that?" Kyungsoo's tone is challenging. They both know their connection to and with each other when it comes to music is no joke. It's the reason Kyungsoo came to him tonight in the first place.

Chanyeol is willing to let Kyungsoo win this time-- in the first place Chanyeol can never win because he knows what Kyungsoo knows and Kyungsoo knows that he knows. The assurance he sees in Kyungsoo's eyes-- that  _you know it's more than that, Chanyeol_ \-- is enough for him for now. Sometime else, maybe he'd force Kyungsoo to say it out loud. Right now he doesn't have to.

"Let's do it then," Chanyeol declares out loud, clapping his hands together in finality and closing his eyes as he nods, a mimicry of someone closing a deal, and he hears Kyungsoo snort. Chanyeol thinks he still sounds beautiful, even like that.

When Chanyeol opens his eyes, Kyungsoo is watching him again in silence. The attention makes heat prickle under his skin.

"What?" Chanyeol says defensively, crossing his arms. He turns his back on Kyungsoo and hunches over his keyboard, fiddling with the buttons across the top.

He suddenly feels an impact from behind him, Kyungsoo's chair rolled towards his to collide lightly. Kyungsoo rests his cheek between Chanyeol's shoulder blades. "When are you going to admit you've been practicing the song and you’ve even memorized the lyrics?"

Chanyeol freezes, and then he feels Kyungsoo's body shaking against his in laughter.

"It's even in English, I'm pretty proud of you--"

"How do you know," Chanyeol rushes out in shock. It isn't a big deal if he really considers it. So what if he's been practicing it so when Kyungsoo ever asks him-- or when he gets the courage to ask him himself-- he'd be ready? Kyungsoo should be thankful--

"Do you still think I don't pay attention to you," Kyungsoo wonders out loud. "I do, you know. You always hum this when you see me. Do you do that on purpose? You aren’t thinking about directing the lyrics to me, are you? I’d be sad."

Chanyeol shakes his head and hopes Kyungsoo picks up on the action.

"Sometimes you sing it, too. When you're cooking food for yourself late at night-- do you follow a special diet or something? Or when you're heading out-- you always take too long to look for your car keys, by the way, I'm thinking of buying one of those wall hooks so you can put it there. Or when you're taking a shower-- I mean I don't listen to you when you take a shower, don't get weird thoughts!" Kyungsoo is laughing again. "But your English is better in the shower for some reason!"

Chanyeol smiles unconsciously at all these little things he hasn't even noticed for himself. The thought of him actually mattering to Kyungsoo--

There are lips at the back of his neck, suddenly; the touch doesn't surprise him as much as it makes his chest feel tight. "Stop thinking you don't matter to me already," Kyungsoo whispers.

Chanyeol swallows and nods his head, and in a moment Kyungsoo is back to his place in front of Chanyeol's simpler keyboard.

The atmosphere makes him fall in love all over again.

"Then," Chanyeol starts. "Next week, will you come over here again?"

Kyungsoo looks confused. "Oh, we aren't doing it tonight?"

"I wanna finish your song tonight," Chanyeol says simply, because there's been a lot of progress since they actually started and he wants to at least have a demo done. He tells Kyungsoo that. "I feel like we can finish it."

Kyungsoo's eyes shine with a positive kind of disbelief. "We can?"

"Why not," Chanyeol asks cautiously. Maybe Kyungsoo didn't want to have a finished product for it after all?

"Ah, it's just--" Kyungsoo smiles, relief on his face. "I didn't think you'd actually do it. Finish it, I mean. I gave so little..."

"Are you doubting me?  _Me_? Park Chanyeol?" He knows Kyungsoo isn't going to think of this as anything like arrogance. Kyungsoo knows how much he loves music-- he wishes Kyungsoo also knows that Chanyeol loves music more when it involves Kyungsoo.

"Aish, so much pride," Kyungsoo teases, but the smile he hides when he turns around has butterflies setting off in Chanyeol's stomach. The  _thank you_  that Kyungsoo whispers does, too.

"Next week, okay?" Chanyeol knows he sounds unsure, and scared, too, that Kyungsoo would change his mind about it after all because of his decision to work on Kyungsoo's song tonight instead. "You'll come over?" And coming over doesn't necessarily mean just Kyungsoo bringing him snacks (they haven't touched the snacks Kyungsoo brought, he realizes now), doesn't necessarily mean just Kyungsoo staying in his studio with him for company. Come over as in-- come over meaning  _stay. Stay with me._

Chanyeol is so in love it hurts his chest. Good thing Chanyeol's always been fond of a little pain anyway.

Despite Kyungsoo's occasional groans of dissatisfaction with himself, and his small hands banging against the keys sometimes (wow, he's picked that up from Chanyeol pretty fast) throughout the remainder of the time they spend there, they actually do finish a demo.

Kyungsoo let Chanyeol record him singing, even though he did have to force Chanyeol to turn around and not watch him while he sings-- it didn't make sense considering Chanyeol still heard his voice loud and clear anyway. (Chanyeol tries not to melt with how Kyungsoo's voice always sounds like melted chocolate, even when his lyrics are still a little unsure and his voice wavers here and there.) (Kyungsoo  _did_ improvise the latter of his lyrics from earlier, Chanyeol learns, but the lines he sang when Chanyeol was actually recording was even better now that Kyungsoo's had the time to think some of the lyrics over in his head when they were working.)

When Chanyeol finishes editing it-- after Kyungsoo so adamantly tried to tell Chanyeol he wants to try to be the one to record Chanyeol playing the piano for him instead of Chanyeol trying to teach him to play it-- Kyungsoo is looking anxious.

Chanyeol attributes it to the fact that he plugged his headphones back into his computer when he got the recording of his piano and Kyungsoo's voice, and he was editing it, putting the layers together and merging them, and he was the only one who could hear it. He took comfort in how Kyungsoo's fist would tighten around Chanyeol's sleeve that he'd gripped, took comfort in the way it clenched the fabric tight in his fingers every time Chanyeol accidentally let out a reaction when he made a few mistakes. Kyungsoo berated him for cursing, too,  _stop saying oh shit when it's my voice you're playing around with in there,_  and he knocked at the housing of his earphones playfully (though really, Kyungsoo looked like he was about to die).

When the demo is done, saved first as a project he can edit later on and then as an audio file, he turns to Kyungsoo and greets him with a genuine smile. He's proud of how it came out-- still a little too raw, but that's the way he likes it-- and he's hoping Kyungsoo would like it, too.

"It's finished," he announces, trying gently to pry Kyungsoo's fingers off from where they're clenching too tight. He gives up when Kyungsoo shakes his head and buries his face into his sleeve, hand still holding him there.

Kyungsoo can be so unnecessarily cute at the most random of times-- he's got short hair and a sharp jaw and a boyish face and he's so manly and handsome and Chanyeol loves that side of Kyungsoo. But when he's like this-- lips jutting out and words muffled and cheeks dusted pink under the studio's shitty lighting-- he's so adorable and Chanyeol just wants to protect him, tuck Kyungsoo into his oversized sweaters and hug him until they both fall asleep.

Chanyeol realizes he's taking too long smiling at how shy Kyungsoo is, but when he presses a kiss to the top of Kyungsoo's head and carefully takes his headphones off of his head with one hand, Kyungsoo still doesn't budge.

"I said it's finished," Chanyeol repeats, trying to gently nudge Kyungsoo off of his arm, but he stays there unmoving, grip unrelenting.

"Delete it," Kyungsoo suddenly says. Again, Chanyeol's sure he doesn't mean it. Kyungsoo knows how much his compositions mean to him, after all. Deleting it is out of the question, really, unless Kyungsoo really, really, seriously wants him to.

"Don't be like that," Chanyeol chastises, but Kyungsoo is still shaking his head even as he slowly pulls back and lets go entirely.

Chanyeol immediately puts his hand behind Kyungsoo's head to keep him from moving too far, keep him in place, uses the other to fit the headphones over Kyungsoo's ears. Chanyeol thinks it might be too big on Kyungsoo's head, and he bites his lip to suppress his smile when it slips past Kyungsoo's ears when Chanyeol lets go and turns to his computer to play the audio.

The first sound that plays is a chord, and then Kyungsoo's voice should follow. By then Chanyeol has already resumed his previous position and is now holding the headphones to Kyungsoo's ears, pressing the housing gently so they wouldn't fall and Kyungsoo has the chance to really hear the song properly.

Kyungsoo's eyes are shiny as they look into Chanyeol's, and he mouths the words as he sings along silently. Right as Kyungsoo's mouth forms the words  _in love_ , his eyes slip closed, and Chanyeol decides it's perfect for a kiss.

So he leans forward and kisses Kyungsoo, his lips soft against his own, warm and inviting, and when Kyungsoo breathes against his mouth, a slight shudder there, Chanyeol still, still falls that much deeper.

When they break apart, Kyungsoo's eyes are still closed, though now there isn't any apprehension left in the fluttering of his eyelashes, only a certain calm that Chanyeol wishes he can give him every day.

He turns to check on his computer how long it will take before the song ends, only fifteen seconds more, and he uses that time to watch Kyungsoo carefully.

Kyungsoo really is handsome. And beautiful. And adorable. And everything Chanyeol has ever fallen in love with and will always,  _always_  keep falling in love with.

Kyungsoo bringing his hands up to cup over the ones Chanyeol is using to hold the headphones up signals that the song has faded out (that's the effect Chanyeol puts at the end of the songs he knows he'll work on again). He opens his eyes, looks up at Chanyeol with that gaze, fond and burning and loving—and he wonders if this is how he looks at Kyungsoo all the time, too.

"Chanyeol--" he starts, lips trembling so slightly Chanyeol wouldn't be able to see it if it weren't for how close they are. "Thank you." He sounds breathless. "Thank you. I mean it. This means a lot to me," he follows as an afterthought. " _You_  mean a lot to me. You know that, right?"

Chanyeol knows. Chanyeol knows Kyungsoo means it. It isn't only a thank you for the song-- it needs a lot more work if they're considering making it into a well-produced one. It's a thank you for letting Kyungsoo in-- and that isn’t just letting him into a private place like his studio-- as in, for  _letting him in_. It's a thank you for wanting to do this with Kyungsoo. It's a thank you for being  _here_ \-- like all the  _'I'm right here's'_ that Chanyeol had meant earlier. It's a thank you for the music and for the love.

"Let's go home," Chanyeol whispers, only drawing back fully when Kyungsoo nods and closes his eyes again, as if reveling in the fact that he's accomplished something, as if savoring the moments he's spent with Chanyeol for the day (or night) (or morning).

As he shuts down his computer and turns off all of his equipment, he thinks about that too. The accomplishment, and the moments. He doesn't know which of blessed or lucky he is more of. All he’s sure of is that he's so fucking in love with Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo grabs the plastic bag of untouched snacks when they've stood up and Chanyeol is holding the door open for him-- which is ridiculous and embarrassing, Chanyeol thinks, when Kyungsoo raises an eyebrow at the gesture, because it isn't like this was a date or something like that.

Chanyeol locks up quickly when they're out of his studio, and that is only when they realize that the sun has already risen and that they'd spent a good three and a half hours, give and take, in there together. The realization doesn't make him as tired as it probably should.

Chanyeol drives them home to the dorms with a hand on Kyungsoo's thigh, and even though Kyungsoo falls asleep three minutes into the drive with his temple pressed to the passenger’s side window, he unconsciously places a hand over Chanyeol's as he shifts to get more comfortable.

"I love you," Chanyeol whispers when he's pulled up and parked the car properly when they get there, leaning over to kiss Kyungsoo on his forehead. It is only now that his lack of sleep is catching up to him, but he thinks that it's the kind of tiredness that's worth it-- like when he stays up talking to fans live or practicing for performances.

The kind of tiredness you feel after either spending time doing something for the people you love or spending time  _with_  someone you love-- Chanyeol thinks this is the kind of exhaustion he doesn't have to feel sorry for, the kind of exhaustion he doesn’t have to regret.

He's tempted to carry Kyungsoo up to the floor of their dorms-- he can, really, it doesn’t matter how he’s suddenly so tired; Kyungsoo is light and Chanyeol would do anything that would make Kyungsoo’s life a little easier-- but he knows Kyungsoo wouldn't appreciate being seen like that, especially since a lot of people (managers or the members) could already be awake at this time in the morning.

So carefully, he touches Kyungsoo's cheek with one hand and shakes his arm gently with the other. "We're home," Chanyeol says, pulling back and getting out of the car to open the door to Kyungsoo's side and dragging him up.

Kyungsoo smiles up at him, dazed from his nap, eyes drooping, but so, so sincerely, and then he whispers back.  _"We're home."_

 


End file.
